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One look at the DVD case tells you all you need to know about Eric Bernt's Bachelor Party Vegas (which, for the record, is no relation to the Tom Hanks Bachelor Party semi-classic from 1984) -- it's stupid, it's raunchy, it's full of semi-famous names, and it's cheaply made.

First-time director Bernt has the following screenwriter/story credits:

Surviving the Game (1994)
Virtuosity (1995)
Romeo Must Die (2000)
Highlander: Endgame (2000)
Bachelor Party Vegas (2006)

Having seen all of those movies, and having nothing personal against Mr. Bernt, I must say this: Yikes.

BPV is about five guys who roam through all of Las Vegas, participating in a series of "wacky" adventures before capping the night off with a finale I won't spoil -- but I will say this: If director David Fincher and screenwriters John Broncato & Michael Ferris decide to file a plagiarism lawsuit against Eric Bernt, they'd have some pretty strong evidence.

Anyway, the "wacky" adventures include paintball with hot sex as the first prize, a lap dance from an obese slob, a casino heist, a porn shoot, a... You get the point.

There are very few laughs to be found amidst the silliness. My 2-star rating might be seen as a little bit generous after you see the movie, but there's something about Donald Faison that always makes me laugh. Even in the lamest flicks (King's Ransom, for example), DF delivers a few chuckles -- and he does so here. Thank god for small favors. The rest of the cast is a mixed bag, at best.

Front and center is Kal Penn, a guy who's been pretty amusing in stuff like American Pie and Harold and Kumar, but he's clearly not an actor accustomed to elevating material this dim. As the allegedly likable groom-to-be, Jonathan Bennett is as mildly charming as his character is blandly written. The rest of the party crew (in other words, the fat one and the geek one) are borderline insufferable.

Peppered throughout the proceedings are folks like Lin Shaye, Daniel Stern, Vincent Pastore, and (in a bizarrely pointless cameo) the lovely Jaime Pressly. None of the gimmick cameos contribute a whole hell of a lot. (Unless, of course, your final goal in life is to see Kathy Griffin portray an Elvis impersonator / spaghetti wrestler.)

Produced by the guys who brought you "The Ultimate Fighting Championship" (which explains why UFC Champ Chuck Liddell gets to play the flick's head thug, and poorly), Bachelor Party Vegas is 4 or 5 mild chuckles hidden within 85 minutes of crotch & dildo schtick.

The DVD

Video: The anamorphic widescreen (1.85:1) transfer isn't half-bad, considering that the flick looks to be an exceedingly low-budget affair.

Audio: Dolby Digital 5.1, with optional subtitles in English and French.

Extras: Just a bunch of trailers for End Game, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children, National Lampoon's Barely Legal, The Cave, and Underworld: Evolution.

Final Thoughts

Sloppy, silly, and only occasionally amusing, Bachelor Party Vegas might find a few fans among the frat house crowd, but it's sure to be forgotten after a bong hit or two.

Skip It on DVD, cuz it'll be on Showtime's heavy rotation for the next two years.
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